A Patio of Sorrows Promises a Journey Home

Revelation 21:4 And He shall wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there shall no longer be any death; there shall no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away. 

We're in the midst of it, yet we remain isolated, separated from it. My mother-in-law is 86 years old and suffers from dementia for many years now. Within her memory care facility, COVID19 infected a few staff and then several residents, my mother-in-law included. 

Transferred to the local community hospital, she received care and did not require a ventilator. No visitations are allowed--continuing the long months we have not physically seen her since this pandemic began. 

My dear friend's daughter is a nurse at this hospital, like an angel sent to keep an eye, a wing over her. We receive the reports every day, her condition, her confusion, her despair, her fear, her rebellion and defiance, her longing to go "home," the doctor calling my brother-in-law. Could that be her childhood home in the Netherlands? Could that be sixty years ago in Culver City when she first immigrated to America? Now she is silent and refusing to eat. 

Home is where one feels safe, protected, surrounded by loved ones. 

Happy. 

She returns home, but it is back to the memory care facility, to a special ward they have set up for "returning" COVID19 patients, for now. It is not the HOME we long for, the place where beauty displays beyond our imaginations, where perfection and all its Glory outshines the sun, where all things are aligned and make sense and we see the purpose in everything, where Jesus and His Grace envelop our Spirit and Love wipes away, disinfects hate forever and ever. 

And so we wait over here, while she is over there, and we pray that she will receive mercy to get home, the Heavenly Home awaiting her where her husband waits, her grandson prepares, Her Heavenly Father hears our prayers. 

I remember the day very well, the day she knew her husband definetly went to heaven, but she did not think, had no assurance she would be "so lucky." 

It had only been a few hours since my father-in-law peacefully got up out of bed in the middle of the night, made himself some soup, sat in his recliner and went to be with the Lord. In the beginning stages of dementia, and in her confusion, she asked me about Heaven, how she could make sure she could see Dad again. 

The birds chirped loudly in the trees as we sat in her small patio. I asked her the questions one asks when sharing the Good News. Do you believe in God, Mom? We cannot have communion with God because of our sin, it has separated us from Him. Do you know why Jesus came Mom? 

She began to talk of her childhood, how she walked herself to Sunday School in the Netherlands, but no one in her family went. She learned a little about God, maybe Jesus. The need for religion or any church affiliation in adulthood only came when convenient, sponsorship by the Luthren Church to come to America, weddings, babtisms, funerals.  My Father-in-law was Catholic, and "he was a good man," she repeated over and over to me in her tears and her overwhelming fears. 

We talked for some time as I held her hands and asked if she wanted to pray, confess her sin, ask Jesus into her heart and have the hope of Heaven. In her thick accent, she pleaded with me to pray and I told her she could repeat the words I said and believe with all her heart that God would hear her. 

And so we did. On the same morning my father-in-law entered Heaven himself, she, even in her confusion and dementia, made Peace with the heavenly Father. 

Isaiah 49:13b "For the Lord has comforted His people, and will have compassion on the afflicted." 

As we returned into the apartment, my husband sitting in Dad's chair, she patted his shoulders and in tears, apologized to her son. 

""I didn't tell you Teddy, I didn't know...I'm so sorry, I never told you about God...Teddy, do you know?" 

My husband, looking up at his mother, in a bit of a surprise, tells her that he knows God, he has salvation, reassuring her that God is good. 

The years go by and her dementia initiates more change and the move to the memory care facility. She no longer knows her grandchildren, her 5 great grand children are a mystery. Her fear overwhelms her and her tears are always evident. Every minute is brand new from the previous one. She won't remember yesterday, a fog of what happened five minutes ago. 

She hugged and loved on me though, in her dementia more than she ever did in her lifetime of having me as her daughter-in-law. 

My tears are evident when I leave her, though I know she is safe. 

And I know as we wait for this next chapter, God, because He is full of Grace, will honor her prayer in the patio of sorrows, welcoming her home. It will be in heaven where she will learn of His character, of His sovereignty, of the stories and the orchestrations. It is there she will meet the saints, hear the choirs, be a part of the Body of Christ and maybe attend Sunday School again, have a ministry.  

I like to think on that, what she has to look forward to. 

Father God, thank You for the opportunity to share the hope of Your Son on that very sad, bittersweet day. I will never forget our precious words together, my mother-in-law and me and Your amazing grace. Today, as we learn of her entering hospice care and we cannot be with her, we ask for Your comfort and peace as You prepare her for eternity and a reunion. May we be ever cognizant of the moments to share the Good News of the Gospel with those You place in our path. May those who know You Lord, never waste a moment not wanting to know You more. This breaks my heart for He longs to give us so much more if we just trust Him. Grace for Salvation is all sufficient, but Sustaining Grace gives us the abundant life promised and a fulfillment of His perfect Will.  Lord, please bless my bother-in-law and his family for he has worked tiredlessly guiding the decisions and doing all the paperwork for her care. Thank You Lord and bless the nurses and doctors in this COVID19 pandemic and all of her previous care. Thank you especially for Nurse Carissa being near to my mother-in-law and all the staff at the hospital. Thank You Lord for the promise of Heaven and for Your comfort and strength for all the days ahead until we too, are Heaven Bound. Amen. 

Leap Day of Faith

Psalm 90:12 "So teach us to number our days, that we may present to Thee a heart of wisdom."


February is the shortest month, only 28 days. Wow! What just happened? I just packed up my Christmas stuff!  March sweeps in to cheer us and bless us after we were loved on by February.

---and all those mattress sales for President's Day!   

Time flies, an idiom all too many of us can relate to.  

We've been given a gift this year; February of 2020 is a Leap Year. An extra day is added to the calendar "to slow down and synchronize the calendar year with the seasons. Leap days were first added to the Julian Calendar in 46 B.C. by Julius Caesar at the advice of Sosigenes, an Alexandrian astronomer." (Earthsky.org). 

As I walked outside tonight, thoughtful and prayerful, but yet still leaving to run an errand, busyness--I paused in awe of the heavens and all its glory. 

That is the juxtaposing moments of life: moving, checking things off real or virtual lists, preparing, working and then relaxing, pondering, being entertained. You know your own day, the planned and sometimes the unplanned. 

The Psalmist asks the Father first, to teach us. We make time in our schedule where we sit under the anointed sharing and applying of His Word. God set aside the Sabbath day, or for most, Sundays for corporate worship. Spending  time with God in my morning drive, in my afternoon conversations and in my evening prayers as well as being reminded of truth in His word is essential for me in my everyday commitment to grow and know Him. Yet, there are those days... 

I pray to be teachable everyday, to be in His Word so that I can have that wisdom in my heart when I need it, when time stands still, when time runs out, when time isn't an option. 

Then the Psalmist says..."teach me to number my days." Well, don't we do this with a calendar, now on our phones and readily available? The Psalmist seems to know and in his wisdom is asking God to help him make the best out of each day, for he knows his time is short as compared to eternity. 

In Psalm 39:4 it states it this way, "Lord, make me know my end and what is the extent of my days. Let me know how transient I am." 

If the calendar gave us one extra day this month, sort of like "more time," I'd hope to use it to better myself, gain more wisdom, recognize my weak, transient ways and more importantly, where my everyday strength comes from. In other words, an extra day to give Him praise and seek His will. 

"If I just had one more day..." 

Think how you might end that sentence. We cannot live victoriously in Christ with regrets. Jesus Christ, on that one day ordained for Him to die and on the third day promised and fulfilled that promise when He conquered all of time and eternity, rising from the dead. He gave us a gift of eternity free from regrets. If we recognize and ponder on this marvelous gift, how much of our time is spent in wanting to know Him more and do His will, give Him the praise He so deserves? How much of our time is wasted? 

Lord, time is fleeting. Our days are numbered. Moments are precious with loved ones and friends. Sometimes, I feel I am in catch-up mode for those times wasted. Lord, I know that You can do exponential things in a heart that humbly submits and seeks Your goodness. You redeem all our days! Lord, help us all to take a "Leap of Faith" and lay down some of our busyness, our apathy and our self-righteous attitudes that we just "don't have time." A sacrificial heart is one You delight in. May my days reflect Your goodness and grace in each day You have given me to make Your Name known.Thank You for my hard days and my glory days, Lord, for both, teach me Your wisdom and empower me with Your strength as my days draw nearer to seeing You, face to face. Amen. 

Morning Glory 

Tangible, Visible Evidence

Ephesians 3:14-16 "For this reason, I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in Heaven and on earth derives its name, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man." 


A question was asked of me, of others this week, "how have you seen a visible, tangible, representation of God--His Holy Spirit dwelling in you?

When I opened my spiritual eyes, recognized my wretchedness before God,  my own sin, then responded to His calling, His open arms and smiling face, I received His Holy Spirit. In that moment of surrender, of knowing I am in need of His mercy--that intimacy between myself and His Spirit recreates a miracle and the connection to His Holy work, that which He willed for my life. This is a constant prayer, "Lord, Your will, not mine." The spiritual becomes the tangible in changed lives, changed desires, changed conversations, changed hopes and new dreams. It also allows a unique perspective, to see more of God in every thing, no matter how random, how insignificant, how worthless the world might judge. That is Holy Spirit.

Everyone sins, misses the mark of perfection and thus, separated from the Holy, (Romans 3:23). At first I just knew from what I was taught-- God made me, and that His Son, Jesus, died for me and that God is Love. If I believed that, I would go to Heaven one day and live there forever. Of course, when you are nine years old, that seems pretty reasonable, simple. God whispered in my ear, "I love you, will you love Me back?"

"Yes," I answered. God came into my heart by means of asking for forgiveness and receiving the Holy Spirit. Can I explain that at the age of  nine? No, but I knew I belonged to Him that day. Serving Him has always been important to me as I studied His Word and served in various ministries. In all this time, some 50 plus years later, the Holy Spirit navigates my steps to a deeper relationship with Him. Have I spent some time being idle, drifting? Yes, I have gone down wayward roads and sat for too long on the bench for the luke warm, watching but not participating. He calls me back and convicts my heart, leading me into His grace and fellowship. I know and recognize that God dwells within me in the form of the Holy Spirit. I didn't need a bunch of classes, a party or a ceremony to know that, to experience His indwelling in me. My prayers for more of Him, my proactive trust--enough. My growing faith in story--evidence, tangible and visible.  And then there are those goose bump moments. That IS Holy Spirit.

We all want to test the world, and we all wander, striving, curious humans we are. When God keeps ringing your spiritual phone of your heart, and He hears busy signals or hang-ups, or just no answer at all...but He persists by sending certain people and certain circumstances and signs--that is tangible Holy Spirit.

When  placed in a compromising situation or have to make a choice and most say one thing, but your heart is saying another, you are feeling that voice of discernment giving you strength--that is Holy Spirit.

When one longs for their mom, sister or brother,  spouse, the kids, best friends, the neighbors, to walk along side you in this journey, seeking growth and knowledge, wisdom and blessings, hope and purpose, pure fellowship of His goodness---more of Him, --that is Holy Spirit.

When you are called to a ministry you never thought possible, to leadership positions and opportunities no one would have placed you in, when scripture comes alive and is always applicable to your situation and prayers, when you have the constant desire to be in His Word, fellowship with His people and seek Him through your trials and adversity--that is Holy Spirit.

One day, my mind and heart crashed and melted. Grief-stricken, drained and depleted from my own thoughts and words, God took over. His Spirit activated a palpable, tangible love on me and began the process of showing me how to lift my head again. I look up and I look back... and I know His grace. His promises I find within me, even more intense than before,  guiding me to His purpose. Part of His healing plan, He stirs and sieves the brokenness, replacing it with Hope. It is tangible, like a frown becoming a smile--that is Holy Spirit.

He lifted my head, to see not one, but dozens of swallowtail butterflies coming down from the trees filtering my grief-filled prayers up to Heaven. They surrounded me in the Light of a new day and a different life, but a hope-filled life. Ten years later, another single, transformed butterfly of the same genus, a swallowtail, lands on my windshield as I am stopped at a light and dances across to my driver's side, constantly fluttering, encouraging me and loving me, a tangible reminder that His Spirit, the Holy Spirit dwells in me and I recognize and feel  LOVED as tears flow. The radio plays Chris Tomlin at that very moment--and that is Holy Spirit, and that is God!

There's a place where sin and shame are powerless.

Where my heart has peace with God and forgiveness.

Where all the love I've ever found.

Comes like a flood,

Comes flowing down.

At the CROSS, that is tangilble, visible in my heart. Hallelujah! 

The butterfly is not something to be worshipped, for it too is temporary, a manifestation of His beauty in creation, but scripture reminds us in Romans 1:19-20:

...because that which is known about God is evident within them; for God made it evident to them. For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and devine nature have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse. 

and in Luke 19:40  "And He answered and said, "I tell you, if these become silent, the stones will cry out!"

Father God, thank You for my salvation and that I know and want more than just the promise of Heaven. Your Holy Spirit was sent to believers so that we can participate in the Holy and receive Your power and strength. You saved me so that I may glorify Your name! What a privilege to be called to Your Plan, to find my own purpose within the gifts You have given me and the discovery of so much through fellowship and Your Word. Because Your Holy Spirit dwells within my soul, my Helper, Strength-giver and Inspirer, I can accomplish mighty things for Your Kingdom, for Your glory, in that I am awed and humbled, thank You Lord. Holy Spirit, thank You for hearing my long prayers, my simple prayers, my utterances and all my thoughts towards wanting Your Will and even those words and thoughts not aligning with Your Will. In that, You bring about Your discerning wisdom and lead me to better places and/or bring about obedience which leaves tangible evidence, for Your glory. Thank You Lord for Your prompts to pray, to listen, to watch and to wait. Thank You Lord for giving me Hope. As I have told my story, some have said to me, "I don't see God like you do..." Oh, Lord, I know that they can, if only they take the time to humble themselves, be authentic before You, asking You for that gift You left for us, Your Holy Spirit, God dwelling within us and among us. God, You so loved the world, every one of us can know You, Father, Son and Holy Spirit--You are welcome here. Amen.

                                         

                                           FRANCESCA BATTISTELLI ~  HOLY SPIRIT

Mind Full of TIME

Ecclesiastes 3:1 "There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven---."

What do people say about time?

"TIME flies when you're having fun."

"There is no TIME like the present."

"You are 'behind the TIMES' with that thinking."

TIME out, TIME served, crunch TIME.

TIME is money!

In the nick of TIME.

Save TIME.

TIME is of the essence...

It's only a matter of TIME.

What was that last one? ...Only a matter of TIME? Until what?

Solomon tells us, until your "appointed TIME, your event under heaven."

↔↔↔

Time flies.Ten years have whizzed by since that day my husband walked through the corridor to find me exiting the chapel in that out of the way hospital--to meet me---broken heart to broken heart, my oldest friend on one side of him, my younger son on the other.

The words at the moment, time shattering and for my moments to come, timeless.

"He didn't make it...He died."

Time stands still.

Since that TIME, I've pursued with every beat of my own heart... to make TIME count,

Double TIME...Well actually... triple TIME, for God, Timmy and myself.

↻↻↻

If you know me, you know I like things that symbolize, commemorate, honor; I'm a collector of keepsakes of TIME well spent.

This last Christmas, we purchased a faux Christmas tree--the first of any larger-sized, focal-point tree we've had since Tim passed away into God's Light, 10 years ago. We happened on it--the right TIME and place. The perfect skinny shape, size and price, it fit perfectly at the bottom of my staircase. After Christmas was over, New Year's Day past, all the decorations tucked away, there stood my cute,  snowy, glittery tree.

A Valentine's Day tree, I thought. It will commemorate that holiday and Tim's 10 years in Heaven--a good excuse to leave it up!  

So, I did just that, giving it and me...more TIME. After a few visits to the Dollar Tree (love that place), and a few things I've had over TIME, Timmy's Love Tree came together. For such a TIME as this, 10 years since his passing, a tree with roots of Love and branches that sparkle like Heaven shines, standing for the memory of our son in this anniversary month.

♡♡♡

What does ten years feel like? Like it just happened?  Yes, some days. The TIMES I have spent with God in healing and listening and reading His Word are immeasurable. In one quick moment, I can hear from the Lord and be uplifted and inspired the whole day. In other TIMES, I miss him so much I feel it physically. God is with me in both situations. TIME marches on, and moves closer to my own homecoming, my own appointed TIME. The cliche, TIME heals, may just give distance, a distance one has learned control in, but I can testify that TIME spent seeking God is what truly brings healing.

So, I make TIME to give Him glory for all He bestows, lavishs on me,  to bring me comfort and insight through all this TIME.

I believe God is pleased with how I have used my TIME to get to know Him more intimately, in ministry, my writing...my story, to make Him known.

⌛⌛⌛

Life is TIME consuming, especially with all the ways we get caught up in,  to waste TIME. I am encouraged by scripture which tells me:

Psalm 90:12 "So teach us to number our days that we may present to Thee a heart of wisdom."

Ephesians 1:9-10 "He made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His kind intention which He purposed in Him with a view to an administration suitable to the fullness of the TIMES, that is, the summing up of all things in Christ, things in the heavens and things upon the Earth, in Him." As a plan for the fullness of TIME, to unite all things in Him, things in heaven and things on earth."

11 Corinthians 6:2  For He says, "At the acceptable TIME I listened to you, and on the day of salvation I helped you. Behold now is the acceptable TIME; behold, now is the day of salvation." 

Father God, thank You for the TIME allotted to me to craft my writing skills and use them to give You glory. Help me Lord to fill my days, not with regrets but with anticipation of what You have in store for me. Thank You for my precious TIME with my son Timothy, even those really hard TIMES. Your will is good and perfect and I trust You in all things. Lord, for those whose days are numbered, (and that is every one of us), help us to draw closer to You and manage our TIME wisely, to include You in our day so that You can pour out Your blessings You have stored up for us. Lord, we do not know when our TIME is, nor do we know the appointed TIME of Your appearance again, but Lord, You ask only that we believe in Your earthly TIME as our Savior and Your Heavenly Time as our Father. Because we trust You, Your plans are good for our welfare and our future. Lord, thank You for the Eternal Time we will have with You in Heaven, for that is our Hope. Amen.

Better Is One Day ~ Kutless 

Timothy B. VanTilburg 

DOB 9-25-1980

Reached Heaven 2-27-2007 

Splendor At The Door Of My Own Heart

Mark 13:29 "Even so, you too, when you see these things happening, recognize that He is near, right at the door."

With Valentine's Day behind me, I now sit and reflect on things marvelous, wonderful, miraculous, incredible, beautiful, and very personal;  things laid in my path on that particular day of love.

I am in humble awe.

As if God and I had divine appointments all day long, He showered me with gifts from Heaven. Hearts appeared and Heavens sang His praises and possibly more. Seeing all these signs, I captured them in photos. The last "heart" of the day is such a wonderment, that I have chosen to share it only in real time, one on one.

Recognizing that God is near for a very long time now, He continues to give me new revelations, adding to my stories of His grace upon amazing grace. I missed my son that day as always, sending Him a Valentine love wish that morning in a post, now almost 9 years since his passing and returning Home. God heard my prayer and lavished on me, allowing me to see what others may not see, what some take for granted, or do not recognize, what some just want to ignore.

But God tells us many times in scripture to be on the alert, to be on guard.

It's not only for discernment and demon-watching, but I also believe and know it is to see His mercy, His forgiveness, His grace, His hope and His beautiful love for us, reaching down, across, up, through-- in such personal ways.

One unique BELIEVER'S heart, underfoot on a pathway where I worship, fellowship and connect to others, saves me, for I gave my heart in belief to Him long ago and I choose to obey Him by serving and worshipping Him within the Body of Christ.

A second SANCTIFYING heart, pools around the thorny rose, pruned back numerous times, but continuing to explode each spring in a bounty of beautiful buds and spectacular blooms. It's the word picture, the many parables of Jesus, sewing and reaping, planting in good soil and on a firm foundation, expecting a harvest and planning for more.

The third, an ETERNAL MESSENGER heart, empowers me to continue on by doing what I am doing, seeking more, surrendering and trusting in the known and the unknown, praising Him and giving Him the Glory for every beat and pulse that moves me forward, giving me opportunity and providing my every need.

Psalm 8:1 O Lord, our Lord, How majestic is Thy Name in all the Earth, who Has displayed Thy splendor above the heavens!"

All of it is an affirmation, right at the door of my own heart. God is Good, He is on the Throne. He empowers us to share our lives in belief, to live our testimony and grow in sanctification, and to be His messengers of love to others whose hearts are crumbled and broken, whose lives are dry and root-rotted, for those who need to see to believe and/or exist as if hope is lost.

Father God, in Your sovereign plan, You already gave each one of us our own miracle. Your Resurrection redeems us so that we can partake in communion again with You and have a relationship in Your grace. These insights and gifts Lord, are Holy; where what can be seen and felt, moves me to pure worship and humbles me to unspeakable joy. Thank you for these gifts this week and may I be prepared and ready, on guard looking continually and intently along my path, walking it with intention. Help me see those in need of life-giving water, and those just needing to reconnect to the Heavens and find Your powerful face of forgiveness and love. Amen.


Please listen to this song and its story. "Tell Your Heart To Beat Again," Danny Gokey.

Forever Young

II Corinthians 4:16 "Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day." 

My husband and I spent Thanksgiving Day at the "Happiest Place on Earth,"  Disneyland. We aren't exactly teenagers, but sometimes, we just like to pretend. We can get away with that at Disneyland.

We become young again, and remember the good ol' days. Surrounded by the things I love, creativity, color and design, gardens and story, I---we feel inspired.

We sat at our outdoor table at a restaurant called the Plaza Inn, our turkey dinners in front of us; my husband grabbed my hand and said,

"Let's pray, I'm hungry." 

 For the first time, I bowed my head and prayed out loud amongst everyone else at Disneyland,  right off Main Street, below Sleeping Beauty's Castle and catty-corner from Tomorrowland.

God made His presence known, for He is always with us in our hearts. His streets and pathways lead to grace and joy, His Kingdom reigns forever, and our future He holds in Eternity

The highlight of our evening concluded watching the "World of Color," water and light productions over Paradise Bay in California Adventure. The shows, filled with songs from the Disney films from my youth (yes waaaaay back then) and some modern songs (Frozen) came to life with animation projected in color,  dancing waters and even fire,  for our wonderment and entertainment.

The final show ended with the song, "Forever Young," composed by Bob Dylan and probably remembered best sung by Rod Stewart.

Maybe Bob spent sometime in the Word when He wrote this...

"Forever Young"

Written by Bob Dylan

May God bless and keep you always 

May your wishes all come true

May you always do for others 

And let others do for you

Matthew 7:12 

"Therefore, however you want people to treat you, 

so treat them, for this is the Law of the Prophets.

May you build a ladder to the stars 

And climb on every rung

May you stay forever young

Proverbs 4:18

But the path of the righteous

is like the light of dawn,

That shines brighter and brighter

Until the full day.

Forever young, forever young 

May you stay forever young.

May you grow up to be righteous 

May you grow up to be true

May you always know the truth 

And see the lights surrounding you

Ephesians 5:9

For the fruit of the light consists in all

goodness and righteousness

and truth

May you always be courageous 

Stand upright and be strong

May you stay forever young

Joshua 1:9

Have I not commanded you? Be Strong

And courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed,

For the Lord God is with you

Where ever you go. 

Forever young, forever young 

May you stay forever young.

May your hands always be busy 

May your feet always be swift

May you have a strong foundation

When the winds of changes shift

I Corinthians 3:11

For no man can lay a foundation other

than the one which is laid, 

which is Jesus Christ.

May your heart always be joyful 

And may your song always be sung

May you stay forever young

Psalm 28:7

The Lord is my strength and my shield;

My heart trusts in Him,

And I am helped.

Therefore, my heart exults

And with my song,

I shall thank Him.

Forever young, forever young 

May you stay forever young.

While out and about today, out of the blue tonight, my husband mentioned the feelings he felt last night, 

"The music...made me think about Timmy, (our son  in Heaven).  It made me miss him. " 

"He is forever young Ted, I thought of him too,  it's all good."

Ted: "I hope Corey can come with us soon, we'd have so much fun."

"He doesn't exactly like hanging out with 'old' parents," I said. 

"WHO says we're old? I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength..."

So tonight, dear friends, may you be "Forever Young," living in and through the promises of the Savior King, the Prince of Peace and the Divine Creator of everything wonderful, colorful and joyful. 

Yes, serving the Lord and knowing Him even beats Disneyland! 

Lord, Tonight and I am grateful and thankful that I have a season pass to Heaven! While I am here on this earth, You help me navigate through all the different "lands" of my life, whether happy places, discouraging places, fearful places or unknown places, You Lord are my Light, my shield, and my King. Thank You Lord for my husband and partner Ted, who enjoys this life with me and that we desire to stay "young"and serve You with all our hearts. Help us Lord to do just that and keep the turnstiles of Your truth moving with ticket holders set for seeing Your Kingdom established. I pray for the sons and daughters still young, that their hope falls upon a Star, one rising in the East that points to the Promised One, the Messiah, The Giver of all things Good. Lord, in thanksgiving, I praise You.  Amen. 

Despair Detour

Psalm 27: 13-14 "I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; Be strong, and let your heart take courage; yes, wait for the Lord."

This is one of my life verses.  I am especially grateful to be writing this tonight, in preparation for continued ministry and opportunities brought my way by the Lord's goodness to me.

~~~

I would have despaired...and I had every right to do just that! We lost our home of 24 years in one wind whipped crackle of electrified air and who knows what else. Uprooted and unprepared, the house lost its status as "our home," and went the way of a house-flipper and real estate broker, eager to pocket the gold dust while we continued to clean -up the soot for months to come.

I would have despaired...BUT GOD!

The Lord met me in the smoke, the rubble, the ash. He poured His love on me through the gaping holes in the roof,  a Refiner's Fire in the purest sense of the Words. Yes, there were some despairing days...but not a lingering despairing soul, not a despairing heart and attitude. Teachable moments and new perspectives,  sifting and sorting of truth at its deepest level, worship gushing out like a fire hydrant, quenching and dousing me in spirit-filled promises and new hopes...I believed!  I felt and knew the Goodness of the Lord.  A beautiful re-built house would no longer be our home, yet God had plans in the land of the living for me.

Wait, He says. Be strong, He says.

I would have despaired...drowned my self in my tears of grief, hid myself from healthy relationships, aligned myself with anger and let it take me down...BUT GOD!

He formed me anew, sturdy in His Word and re-roofed with a righteous belief that the land of the living in Christ includes Eternity! My oldest son no longer despaired in his pain and illness. Amazing Grace heals and is an answered prayer in the bigger-God picture of His will. I would have despaired if He did not give me a glimpse of this very thing, more than a glimpse really, a continual reflection seen in the world around me. Heaven is filled with His glory and to know that His purpose for me would be one of courage...

I would have despaired...but I am in awe!  

In awe of a God who gives and takes away, and I wait. I look through eyes wide open seeing all His goodness.  Despair hides your eyes, but belief and trust opens them up wide to view and walk in the Land of the Living...all the way to Heaven. Blessed Be His Name!

Lord Jesus, Thank you for allowing me the need to see Your goodness. Thank you for eyes that search the heavens and Heaven that comes to me through Your gift of the Holy Spirit. Thank you for healing and insight into your plan. Help me Lord to stay strong, to have courage to continue to do Your will in the path which You have sent me. Help me find compassion and words for others who despair in this despairing world, one in need of Your Hope. Thank you Lord for a ministry in the Land of the Living and may I continue in Your strength, each day within Your grace, for Your glory. Amen.

For your own journal: Where has God given you courage?

Prep Time

Isaiah 40:3  A voice of one is calling: "In the wilderness, prepare the way for the Lord; make straight in the desert a highway for God."

My son and I, working late into a Friday night, prepare the fruits, lay out the fish, chop up the onions to make cive'che, and continue to prepare for a big fish fry fundraiser planned for tomorrow evening. 

I went shopping. Setting things in order, scraps quickly go in the garbage. I wash dishes and put things away, leaving space, making the way clear for his handiwork with a knife.

Without proper preparation, chaos in the kitchen and a less than satisfactory result could be our outcome.   

Corey set me up with the task of  rolling the limes, slicing and squeezing. Who would know that these little gems of deliciousness together, supply so much juice?

I am following my son's lead, as he has done this before. 

When I shared the event with a friend today, she surprised me by asking if I needed plates and napkins; she would gladly drop them off in the morning for our event. What a blessing! 

Earlier preparation included extensive advertising and of course, several fishing trips to supply and inspire our event. 

We anticipate a fun and successful day. 

Have you prepared your heart for what God wants you to hear--what He wants to stir up in your walk with Him? 

Some of us need more prep time than others.  We don't see the clutter, the garbage in the way. 

Things remain frozen and what we've "caught"...we don't know what to do with. 

Maybe you've "left things out on the counter," always with a good intention, but how things spoil fast!  

Sometimes it takes someone whose experience teaches us how to take a step, encourage us in the right ways to prepare. We begin to read His Word and study to learn, spend more time in prayer, actually attend church and get involved. 

Other times, a blessing comes unexpectedly and we see the goodness of the Lord. It makes us yearn for more. Gratefulness prepares us again into humbleness and to recognize more of His grace.  

When He's touched us,  inspired by the Holy Spirit to grow, sharing comes natural and with God, we boldly tell our story and  anticipate with joy, all He has prepared for us. 

Jesus, He's all about preparation: "And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you to myself; that where I am, there you may be also."

Clear what clutters, lay out your purchased heart before Him.  Allow Him to make you into a "gem of deliciousness," prepared to receive and serve all His goodness. 

Lord, thank you that you lead us into preparation for all you have for us. You show us, when we humble ourselves before you, where the clutter lies. You gather it and discard it, clearing the way for us to receive abundant life. The results are a bounty of Your goodness and wisdom from Your Word that continues to prepare us to walk everyday in Your light. What You prepare for us--indescribable!  Amen.